There were once 2 brothers who lived on the 80th level. On coming home one day, they realized to their dismay that the lifts were not working and that they have to climb the stairs home.After struggling to the 20th level, panting and tired, they decided to abandon their bags and come back for them the next day. They left their bags then and climbed on. When they have struggled to the 40th level, the younger brother started to grumble and both of them began to quarrel. They continued to climb the flights of steps, quarreling all the way to the 60th floor.They then realized that they have only 20 levels more to climb and decided to stop quarreling and continue climbing in peace. They silently climbed on and reached their home at long last. Each stood calmly before the door and waited for the other to open the door.

And they realized that the key was in their bags which was left on the 20th floor

This story is reflecting on our life…many of us live under the expectations of our parents, teachers and friends when young. We seldom get to do the things that we really like and love and are under so much pressure and stress so that by the age of 20, we get tired and decided to dump this load.

Being free of the stress and pressure, we work enthusiastically and dream ambitious wishes.

But by the time we reach 40 years old, we start to lose our vision and dreams. We began to feel unsatisfied and start to complain and criticize. We live life as a misery as we are never satisfied. Reaching 60, we realize that we have little left for complaining anymore, and we began to walk the final episode in peace and calmness.

We think that there is nothing left to disappoint us, only to realize that we could not rest in peace because we have an unfulfilled dream …… a dream we abandoned 60 years ago.

So what is your dream? Follow your dreams, so that you will not live with regrets

Source: Chains Concepts – Emotional Intelligence

The Mental Health Foundation published a report, In the Face of Fear (April 2009) talking about how fear and anxiety effect our health and society. The main findings included

• 37% of people in the survey say they get frightened or anxious more often than they used to
• 29% say that fear and anxiety have stopped them from doing things they wish they had done
• 49% say they get anxious about money, with 66% experiencing some degree of fear and anxiety about the currnet financial situation
• Women are twice as likely to experience fear and anxiety than men

For a full details of the finding you can get a summary of the report here.

The commonly know acronym of FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real, and when you look at the true evidence for each individual case this holds true. A lot of our anxieties and fears are based on assumptions and the unknown.

Fear is good. Without fear we would not survive, however when that fear takes us over and prevents us from doing what we really want to do, then it becomes a problem. Look at the evidence. What facts do you have that justify the fear?

There are many tools that can help us to cope with fear, one tool is to understand the moment. The Now. By being in the moment you allow yourself to put things in perspective and dilute the feeling.

Try it for a day or two. When you are feeling anxious, take a moment be in that moment, don’t allow the past of the future impact on what you feel and see what it feels like. This may take some practice, the more you do it the easier it will become.